No one wants to be the first to ‘catch feelings’

by Jessica Snyder

Dating today is hard. When I was in my late teens, early 20’s, dating was a different experience. If you liked someone, you went on a few dates and then either moved into relationship territory or called it quits.

This generation has it a lot harder and even though I grew up when it was okay to have feelings for someone, the trend of not caring, or at least pretending not to care, had seeped into men my age as well.

Today people try their hardest to not be the person

who likes the other too much. No one is willing to “catch feelings” for the other and we are in a constant battle

of wills against the people we are attracted to. How did this become a thing? Why do we wait a certain number of hours or days before replying to a text from a person we are into? Why do we pretend like we do not care when
we clearly do? What is the purpose of this?

Is everyone afraid of liking another person romantically
or is this all about pride? Is the fear of rejection causing us to actually push people away before we can get hurt instead of allowing love in and risking it all?

I think that is the saddest part of it. We are all so guarded that we are missing these amazing opportunities to actually be with the person we are into. Yeah, we might get hurt, but… we might not. Why are we afraid to try? If it doesn’t work out, we dust

ourselves off and move on. Is it really hurting us that much more to have tried and

failed than it is to push our feelings down and not try
at all in the first place. Our heads are making us play an emotional chess game with one another even though
our hearts are already in it. That hurts too. We really aren’t protecting ourselves by pretending we don’t care. We are only denying ourselves the chance for some real happiness.

Instead of swiping right on multiple people, why don’t we just find one person who we are into and see where that goes? Why is this such a complicated request?

On that note, I challenge each of you to put in time and effort with the next person you like. Go all in and see what happens. What I have learned in my life thus far is that we rarely regret the things we
did as much as we regret the things we didn’t do.

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